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5 Stages of Being Drunk
Stage 1 - SMART
This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the
known Universe. You know everything and want to pass on your
knowledge to anyone who will listen.At this stage you are always
RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG.
This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are SMART.
Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING
This is when you realise that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the
entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect
stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you.Bear
in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to this person
about any subject under the sun.
Stage 3 - RICH
This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world.
You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armoured
truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at
this stage, because of course, you are still SMART, so naturally you
will win all your bets.It doesn't matter how much you bet 'cos you
are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy,
because now you are the BEST LOOKING person in the world.
Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone especially
those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because
nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the
partners of the people who you fancy and challenge to a battle of
wits or money.You have no fear of losing this battle because you are
SMART, you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING than they are
anyway!
Stage 5 - INVISIBLE
This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness.
At this point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You
dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the
rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also
invisible to the person who wants to fight you.
You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs
because no one can see or hear you and because you're still SMART
you know all the words. Click here for more Bar Jokes |
